Sunday, March 21, 2010

On a Cold Saturday Night!!

So last Saturday night, I was invited to play a Hold-em game, with a group of about 15 players. The weather was terrible, so being inside seemed like a great idea. I hate cold weather! Now, with my skill level being what it is, my expectations were not very high. I thought it was going to be just a beating or more probable a good donation opportunity!
So the game began, with the usual sizing up of each other. The plethora of personalities, ranging from loud, to church mouse quiet. Such a variety of really nice people, the kind that you really would want for friends. It is such a lot of fun to watch how some people broadcast the contents of their hand, while others are trying to remain, so cool. Usually, when someone is trying play it cool, they have pocket aces, wanting the other players to think they have nothing. That is part of the fun, trying to spot a bluff when it is happening.
The seats were set, and the game began. The first hand, I got beat like a drum. What was next? Two more bad hands, that I folded. So thinking I would be the first one out, and fearing the embarrassment, I got the shock of all shocks! I started winning! The next 6 or 7 hands were mine! What a new, exciting, experience for me. So, I tried to lose a couple of hands, thinking all the while it was all a dream, but the winning continued. Man, the poker gods were smiling on me! So needless to say, it was off to the final table. I had taken out some very seasoned players, the green pea was winning.
When we started the winners table, the luck changed, or perhaps it was the skill level changed. At this table sat the lady that is the admitted master, she is so good that she is always in the money. Another lady sitting at this table is the queen of bluff, you can never tell what she has in her hand. A couple of guys that play with a lot of regularity, very strong players. A guy that is new, that has more personalities than Sybil. As a matter of fact, he has so many personalities, we weren't sure who was going to show up, every hand. With this guy, change was the norm. Then of course there was me, feeling like a fish out of water. My first time at the winners table. I had never been invited to the winners table, because of the losing factor. Success, here I come!
The hand starts out with the Bluffing Queen as the dealer. I got a 3 and a 7 off suite, so I fold. The Queen takes the hand. Soon the big blind falls to me, it is 500,1000, not chump change. The poker gods smile again and I win with pocket aces. That next hand the show began. The wild guy assumed the persona of a very overt gay guy. He would squeal with joy when he got his cards, bet wildly, and he drove the bluffing queen crazy. He out bluffed her! It was for a big pot, and broke her Mojo, I might add! Man, was she pissed! But, do you think he stopped there, oh hell no! He had everyone at the table laughing so hard, to keep the ball rolling, he decided to become someone else. This time he became an old time, black, holiness preacher. He shouted, "praise the lord" with every card! He shouted, "thank you Jesus", every time someone folded. It was like there was an old time revival taking place. We were all laughing so hard, that tears were running down our faces. The wild man kept on winning, out bluffing the queen to the point of owning her.
Was that the end? No! He went after the master next. He began speaking with a french accent, trying to woo her over to his side. No one was safe. I can truly say that he brought a new element of fun to the game. It was worth it to me! I came in second, thanks to the wild one. And we all had to admit that it was more fun than a barrel of monkeys. I am pretty sure he will show up at the next game! Well, I should say, his body will be there. But who will he be? We will find out soon enough!

Friday, March 19, 2010

Texas March Madness

Listening to the network and local weather forecasts is becoming a beating. All of these weather stars have more excuses than Carter has pills. You may ask why I watch this dribble? It is some sort of perverse joy in watching the self righteous fall, get it wrong, then blame the gods that they were wrong.
The weather is ever changing here in North Texas, and of course it has to bigger and badder than anywhere else on earth! With it being March, the first day of Spring near, history should teach us that we will have a one more good freeze. No planting until after Easter! Remember straw hats, okay to plant. Felt hats, need to wait!
My Grandmother was correct in her country ways. She said," There are only two kinds of people that predict North Texas weather, fools and newcomers." She added, " I don't know anybody new!"


Friday, March 12, 2010

Help Me Understand

I am the proverbial pain in the neck guy, always wanting to know why. This is considered a bad trait to those in control, who hate to be questioned! But, I am happy to be the way I am. It is those commands, that do not make sense, that make me question the logic of the command giver. Does adhering to wishes of the controllers make us intelligent? Is that behavior required of us to accomplish a higher status in life?
Taking a look at the politics of our government, how frustrated we can become. How is it a small select group of "thinkers, also known as the rich", know what is better for our lives? How can these people be so pompous as to believe they should tell us, the population what to do and how to do it?
Who are the financiers to the super rich? Who is so rich, that they loan money to the Arab oil states? It is hard to fathom such incredible wealth. Are these the same family's that loaned money to both warring factions in WW ll?
Who controls the state and city governments. Who controls all the local banks? Who actually controls the ACLU? How does a nutcase group get all their money? Who finances PETA, Greenpeace, the KKK, Jesse Jackson, Al Sharpton? The list is endless.
I suppose, that very few of my questions will be ever answered, at least, while I am in this skin.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

Ralph's Wit and Wisdom

Ralph, the guy with the talking dog, offered up some wisdom the other day. He said that he never dated any woman with little feet! Everyone there asked at the same time why. So Frank said," if a woman with little feet ever gets fat, it makes them very hard to live with!" All of the crowd wanted to know why, so he continued," I am married to a woman with big feet, she got fat, and cranky. Think how cranky she would have become if she had little feet!"
Good ol Ralph.